Asexual Representation: Why I Get So Worked Up Over It

The short answer? There’s hardly any Ace Representation in the media.

Yes I am an asexual so this is probably the main reason why I get so worked up over it but I have my reasons.

When I watch a TV show, watch a movie, or read a book there’s just something, for me, that I can never relate to. This need for sex. I find the scenes uncomfortable and out of the blue. I want to be able to watch a show or read a book and know that there’s a character who is exactly like me, and it’s not just speculate it’s CANON. I don’t want the author to canonise the asexuality on twitter or on other social media and not state the word in the book, for me it’s good but not good enough. I don’t want there to be certain things that indicate the asexuality but not the confirmation. I need the confirmation.

There’s a lot of problems when it comes to not canonising asexual characters by using the  word “asexual” or “ace” because you can never know if this person really is because you can never see it. When it comes so other queer characters it’s easily distinctive to who they are attracted to. If the character is gay the book/show/movie will show them with or thinking about the same gender. The same goes for bisexual characters, as they can be shown with or thinking about more than one gender. But when it comes to showing someone NOT feeling something it’s harder because how do you show it?

It’s not that hard to throw in the word “asexual” or “ace” into a conversation. For example put the asexual character in a position where another character is talking or showing sexual attraction to another character and allow the ace character to say something like “I’m too ace for this,” or even get them to respond to “How are you?” with “I’m ace” and make them snicker or something to indicate that there’s a deeper meaning to the response. There’s so many interesting ways to come out as ace, see here are a few examples. Spice it up a bit. Make it fun.

By having these asexual characters on screens and in books it allows more allosexual people to become educated on the asexual community and this may even help people who are trying to find out their sexuality. This then allows them to understand us better and not question us when we decide to come out to them. It could also get rid of some of the stereotypes that come along with coming out as asexual. And show the world that we are also human. That even though some of the ace community live without sex doesn’t mean you have to feel sorry for us. Asexuals aren’t always the quiet, or guarded, or “robot like” beings that society makes us to be. We are still human. Humans who need representation.

But the biggest reason of all: I want more characters like me. I want to be able to to connect with a character for more reasons than I connect with my current favourite characters. I want to be able to know that these characters understand what I’ve been through and what I will constantly be going through. I want to be able to know that my part of the community is being represented. In a good way.

Give Me:

  • Asexual Characters who are introverted
  • Asexual Characters who are extroverted
  • Asexual Characters who are sex positive
  • Asexual Characters who are sex repulsed
  • Asexual Characters in Queer Platonic Relationships
  • Asexual Characters who are main characters
  • Asexual Characters who are side characters
  • Asexual Characters in long term relationships
  • Asexual Characters who are virgins
  • Asexual Characters who have never been in a relationship
  • Asexual Characters discovering who they are
  • Asexual Characters coming out

It’s 2016 it’s time for more asexual representation.


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